he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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