Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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