Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
