did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize