I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize