Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
