She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
