Texts From Last Night

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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.

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  (513): Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere. http://tfl.nu/ay2u
  Replies (11) Good night (5123) Bad night (468)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I GOT MY PERIOD!

  (706): View more from Georgia

  damn. i had names picked out.

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  (706): I GOT MY PERIOD! (706): damn. i had names picked out. http://tfl.nu/tcr6
  Replies (18) Good night (7158) Bad night (963)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula

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  (608): i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula http://tfl.nu/sb2u
  Replies (29) Good night (4235) Bad night (875)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man

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  (207): Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man http://tfl.nu/9o60
  Replies (43) Good night (6368) Bad night (958)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.

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  (201): He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college. http://tfl.nu/379h
  Replies (44) Good night (4141) Bad night (651)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes

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  (516): Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes http://tfl.nu/edsk
  Replies (31) Good night (9191) Bad night (773)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night

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  (617): Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night http://tfl.nu/jx5s
  Replies (13) Good night (6487) Bad night (894)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes

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  (618): You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes http://tfl.nu/5pp7
  Replies (6) Good night (2685) Bad night (913)
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  (637): View more from

  I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night

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  (637): I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night http://tfl.nu/nv4l
  Replies (0) Good night (1216) Bad night (430)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.

  (1-410): View more from Maryland

  Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.

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  (410): Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI. (1-410): Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return. http://tfl.nu/zi1i
  Replies (10) Good night (880) Bad night (1897)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!

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  (312): I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success! http://tfl.nu/tj5b
  Replies (8) Good night (1762) Bad night (479)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress

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  (503): I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress http://tfl.nu/vffb
  Replies (8) Good night (441) Bad night (525)
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  (310): View more from California

  I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.

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  (310): I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know. http://tfl.nu/cmhk
  Replies (2) Good night (552) Bad night (218)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon

  (850): View more from Florida

  Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found

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  (561): I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon (850): Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found http://tfl.nu/d5sg
  Replies (4) Good night (704) Bad night (191)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.

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  (248): There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now. http://tfl.nu/xeuz
  Replies (2) Good night (172) Bad night (373)

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