So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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