I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
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