It's just like the Real World with babies
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
