Fine. I'll sleep in my office
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
