Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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