what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
My vagina just recognized that song.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
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