But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
