what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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