it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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