Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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