You're so nebulous sometimes
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
