I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
