we have pet lesbian snakes
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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