Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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