so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
You need a sexual gate keeper
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
