That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Randomize
