Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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