Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize