I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
