he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
