its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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