Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
