I puked a lego.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
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