So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
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what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
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well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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