why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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