Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
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Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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