I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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