i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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