i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize