No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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