We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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