I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
