Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
