I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
