We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
either way he was missing a nipple.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Found your dick twin last night
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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