I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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