This dress was meant to end up on your floor
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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