Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize