Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
