For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
