The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
