I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
