Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
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Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
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I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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