i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Congratulations! We have a period
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