4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Randomize
